I am pleased to inform you that today, 30 June 2019, I have completed the revision of the “BEING GAY” volume THE LIFE OF GAYS THROUGH THE ANALYSIS OF REAL EXPERIENCES, of the Gay Project Library. The book can be downloaded in full at no cost and in a completely anonymous form by clicking on the link:

BEING GAY by Gay Project

For convenience I add the complete index of the work.
I will begin today working to put the .epub edition on the web as soon as possible.
I sincerely thank anyone who wants to report errors, propose improvements or provide advice.
If you like, you can contact me at:

[Image: gayproject_mail.jpg.1347313114407.jpg]
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BEING GAY
GENERAL INDEX 

About this book 
1 UNDERSTANDING TO BE GAY 
1.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
1.1.1 The discovery of masturbation
1.1.2 Gay discomfort 
1.1.3 Gay falling in love and frustration
1.1.4 Sexual imprinting 
1.1.5 Religious education and homosexuality 
1.1.6 Pornography and educational pressure
1.1.7 Masturbation and sexual orientation
1.1.8 False sexual orientation indicators 
1.1.9 Awareness, mechanisms of removal and underestimation  
1.1.10 Acceptance difficulties 
1.2 DOCUMENTS 
1.2.1 How I understood I was gay
1.2.2 I realized I was gay at 26
1.2.3 Feeling gay and reborn
1.2.4 Gay only when I masturbate
1.2.5 A difficult path to acceptance of my being gay
1.2.6 Affection for a girl and love for a gay guy
1.2.7 How to understand that you are not gay
1.2.8 Fear of being gay
1.2.9 Being aware of being gay in love and rediscovering sexuality
1.2.10 Sublimated hetero love and gay masturbation
1.2.11 I discovered I was gay at the age of
65 1.2.12 Heterosexual experiences of a gay guy
1.2.13 From pretended straight to gay at age of 30
1.2.14 A gay guy in love
1.2.15 Gay games of straight guys
1.2.16 Anti-gay therapy
 
2 BISEXUALITY
2.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
2.1.1 Dichotomy between affectivity and sexuality
2.1.2 Hetero-curious men and sexuality of escape
2.1.3 Bisexuality and masturbation
2.1.4 False bisexuality in the obsessive compulsive disorder
2.1.5 Degree of gay propensity of bisexuals
2.1.6 Bisexuality as a transitory category
2.1.7 How many are bisexuals? 
2.1.8 Polarization of bisexuality
2.1.9 Bisexuality and problems arising from exclusivity
2.1.10 Devaluation of bisexuality by partners
2.1.11 Problems of the heterosexual modeling of bisexual sexuality 
2.1.12 Periodic bisexuality
2.2 DOCUMENTS
2.2.1 Maybe I’m gay but I love my former girlfriend
2.2.2 Periodic bisexuality?
2.2.3 Exchange of emails with a hetero-curious
2.2.4 Exchange of emails with a bisexual almost gay
2.2.5 A married bisexual
2.2.6 Bisexuality in an online interview
2.2.7 From hetero to bisexual to gay
2.2.8 A 36 years old guy between gay and bisexual
2.2.9 A gay between a straight and a bisexual
2.2.10 Bisexuality without trauma
2.2.11 Bisexuality, prejudices and ostracism
 
3 COMING OUT
3.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
3.1.1 Homophobia and conformism reaction
3.1.2 Familial homophobia and defense strategies
3.1.3 Coming out and outing
3.1.4 Declared and undeclared
3.1.5 Coming out with parents
3.1.6 Unintentional coming out
3.1.7 Privacy violations and forced coming out
3.1.8 Coverage relationships and defensive coming out
3.1.9 Coming out to a guy with whom one is in love
3.2 DOCUMENTS
3.2.1 Gay guys and girls as red cross nurses
3.2.2 Coming out and physical attraction
3.2.3 Gay guys and family traps
3.2.4 Coming out as a dangerous temptation
3.2.5 A coming out ended badly
3.2.6 History of a double coming out
3.2.7 From openly gay to hidden gay
3.2.8 Coming out at school – School diary 1976-77
3.2.9 Coming out in chat
3.2.10 Gay love and coming out
3.2.11 My father gay
3.2.12 Openly gays and their relatives
 
4 GAY BOYS AND PARENTS
4.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
4.1.1 Family conflicts related to homosexuality
4.1.2 Religious conditioning
4.1.3 Dialogue between parents and sons
4.1.4 Parents and role of support
4.1.5 Parents and sex education of gay boys
4.1.6 Medicalization of homosexuality
4.1.7 Privacy of gay sons and parental intrusions 
4.1.8 Affective education of gays and family homophobia
4.1.9 Parental victimhood
4.1.10 Parental attitudes about masturbation
4.1.11 Mother’s approach to gay son’s sexuality
4.1.12 Parents and sexual anxiety of the son
4.1.13 ”Helping” a gay son
4.1.14 Relationships of gay boys with the psychologist
4.1.15 Undue interferences in the lives of gay sons
4.1.16 False acceptance
4.1.17 Education for prevention
4.1.18 Gay boys and family violence
4.1.19 Relations between parents and gay sons
4.2 DOCUMENTS
4.2.1 That thin rubber wall
4.2.2 Father policeman and gay son
4.2.3 I have a gay son who does not even talk to me
4.2.4 Gay son and absent father
4.2.5 If I had a gay son
 4.2.6 Anguish of the father of a gay son
4.2.7 A gay guy harassed by his parents
4.2.8 Gay guys between rejection and dialogue
 
5 REASONING WITHOUT PANIC
5.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
5.1.1 Panic and rationality
5.1.2 Objective data
5.1.3 Gays and myth of the charming prince
5.1.4 Autonomy and economic independence
5.1.5 Equilibrium between affectivity and practical life
5.1.6 Discouragement and commitment
5.1.7 Gay loneliness and gay friendships
5.1.8 Gays and possible happiness
5.1.9 Correcting one’s mistakes
5.1.10 Reversible habits and choices
5.1.11 Usefulness of moral discomfort
5.2 DOCUMENTS
5.2.1 Ok, I’m gay but I do not know what to do
5.2.2 Reflections of a gay over 30 
 
6 GAYS AND FRUSTRATION
6.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
6.1.1 Frustration-inadequacy and frustration-rejection
6.1.2 Unachievable purposes
6.1.3 Frustrations in relationships between two gays 
6.1.4 Projective mechanisms and socialization
6.1.5 Virtual relationships between gays
6.1.6 Texts not sexually connoted
6.1.7 Online chats and projective mechanisms
6.1.8 The drift of the love language 
6.1.9 Friendships in chat
6.1.10 The value of experience
6.1.11 Affective frustrations and other frustrations
6.1.12 Coexisting with frustrations
6.1.13 Aggressive frustration and passive frustration 
6.1.14 Different types of gay frustrations 
6.1.15 Frustration before and after the arrival of the Internet
6.1.16 The risks of frustration
6.2 DOCUMENTS
6.2.1 Resist frustration
 6.2.2 Understanding the origin of frustration to go beyond
6.2.3 Frustration, fear and regret
6.2.4 The cry of pain of a young gay
6.2.5 Acting a gay love
6.2.6 Gays and school of prejudices 
6.2.7 Gay sex and hypocrisy 
6.2.8 Christmas Eve: a text not sexually connoted
 
7 I’M GAY AND I’M GOOD ABOUT MYSELF
7.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
7.1.1 Being comfortable with yourself
7.1.2 Self-esteem
7.1.3 Low self-esteem linked to one’s physicality
7.1.4 Low self-esteem linked to one’s sexual physicality
7.1.5 Low self-esteem for character reasons
7.1.6 The premises to recover self-esteem
7.1.7 Parity and dependence within the couple
7.1.8 Formalization of relationships
7.1.9 Heterosexuals and (obsessive) fear of being gay
7.1.10 Gays and discomfort of being gay
7.1.11 Pessimism, depressive attitudes and self-esteem
7.1.12 Low self-esteem and search for the ideal partner
7.1.13 Unilateral discourses and dependence
7.1.14 Frenetic phase and sexual embarrassment
7.1.15 A gay story of emotional addiction
7.1.16 Gay mental narcissism
7.2 DOCUMENTS
7.2.1 Message from an old and sick gay 
7.2.2 Gay experiences 
7.2.3 A gay guy looking for the best guy 
7.2.4 Gay dignity 
7.2.5 Gay sunset 
 
8 GAY AFFECTIVITY
8.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW 
8.1.1 Gay affectivity 
8.1.2 Family affectivity and coming out 
8.1.3 Friendship affectivity and coming out 
8.1.4 Affective research and gay sexual research 
8.1.5 Economic model of gay affectivity 
8.1.6 Weak and gratuitous affectivity, emotional affinity 
8.1.7 Free friendship and instrumental friendship 
8.1.8 Friendship between gays 
8.1.9 Affective equilibrium 
8.1.10 Sexuality as a substitute of affectivity
8.1.11 Failure of couple life
8.1.12 Affectivity crisis and non-affective sexuality
8.2 DOCUMENTS 
8.2.1 Gays and couple solidarity 
8.2.2 Gay relationships without an end
8.2.3 Love stories of a gay eighteen year old
8.2.4 Gays and heterosexual nostalgia
8.2.5 Non-sexual gay love and sublimation
8.2.6 Extended gay family
8.2.7 Gay love stronger than despair
8.2.8 Love in a gay family
8.2.9 A gay coach falls in love in the gym
8.2.10 Viscous gay relationships
 
9 GAY SEX EDUCATION 
9.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
9.1.1 Acquisition of basic concepts: male, female, couple and family
9.1.2 School books and heterosexual culture
9.1.3 Sex education through films and television
9.1.4 Sex education and sport
9.1.5 Sex education and religion
9.1.6 Parents and sex education
9.1.7 Sex education: taboo and scandal
9.1.8 Building one’s own concept of sexuality
9.1.9 Repressive sex education
9.1.10 Risks of obscurantism and prohibitionism
9.1.11 Pornography on the net
9.1.12 Sex education delegated to Church and pornography
9.1.13 Hetero-gay and gay-gay models of gay relationship
9.1.14 Hetero-gay relationship
9.1.15 Hetero-gay relationships and feminization of the gay
9.1.16 The seduction in the hetero-gay relationship
9.1.17 Evolution of hetero-gay relationships 
9.1.18 Heterosexuals and gay sex
9.1.19 Motivations for the practice of sexuality
9.1.20 Married heterosexuals and gay sex 
9.1.21 Birth of pornography 
9.1.22 Gay-gay relationships
9.1.23 Genetic-epigenetic basis of education
9.1.24 Wrong family educational attitudes
9.1.25 Family conflicts
9.1.26 Confidence and confidentiality
9.1.27 Inadequacy of parents
9.1.28 Environmental sex education and social roles
9.1.29 Basic homo-affectivity and basic hetero-affectivity
9.1.30 The prevention of sexual abuse
9.1.31 Risks coming from the Internet
9.1.32 Affective attitudes of parents and education through the example 
9.1.33 How to deal with the issue of homosexuality
9.1.34 Pedophile fantasies 
9.1.35 Dogmatic preconceptions about couple life
9.2 DOCUMENTS
9.2.1 Hell and heaven of a gay guy 
9.2.2 Are my sexual fantasies gay?
 
 10 GAYS AND RELIGION
10.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
10.1.1 Religious prescriptions
10.1.2 Religious prescriptions and morality
10.1.3 Chastity
10.1.4 Prohibition-transgression-guilt 
10.1.5 Religion and self-repression
10.1.6 The religion from ”doing” to ”not doing”
 10.1.7 Catholic Church and masturbation
10.1.8 Catholic Church and homosexuality
10.1.9 Gay guys and confession
10.1.10 Gay guys and Catholic Church: possible options 
10.1.11 Reparative therapies
10.1.12 World health organization and reparative therapies
10.2 DOCUMENTS
10.2.1 Misunderstandings among gay guys and Christian parents
 10.2.2 A gay in love
10.2.3 How a gay guy confronts religion
10.2.4 Or Christian or gay 
10.2.5 Church, freedom and secular morality
 10.2.6 A gay guy saved from reparative therapies
10.2.7 The true story of a gay priest
11 GAY SEXUALITY
11.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
11.1.1 Contents of the chapter
11.1.2 Gay love and gay sex
11.1.3 Non-possessive gay love
11.1.4 Obstacles to love relationships
11.1.5 Fake falling in love and sexual exploration
11.1.6 Gay sex with lightness
11.1.7 Gay sex and sexual play
11.1.8 Gay sexuality and hetero affectivity
11.1.9 Late masturbation and delayed adolescence
11.1.10 Sexual violence and sexual abuse
11.1.11 Sex addiction
11.1.12 Sexual discomfort and transgressive sexuality
11.1.13 Ego-dystonic homosexuality
11.1.14 Gays and dysfunctional sex 
11.1.15 Homosexuality and paraphilias 
11.1.16 Gay anal sex: false myths and pornography
11.2 DOCUMENTS 
11.2.1 Reconstruct a gay sexuality
11.2.2 Gay sex on cam
11.2.3 Tenderness and gay sexuality
11.2.4 A gay in the gym
11.2.5 Nakedness and gay sexuality
11.2.6 Gay themed OCD and nakedness at the gym
11.2.7 Gay sex and many doubts
11.2.8 Gay polygamy
11.2.9 One hundred percent Gay
11.2.10 Gay guys in the pool between tenderness and sexuality
11.2.11 Gay sexual behaviors
11.2.12 Gay love forever
11.2.13 Sexual abuse and gay sexuality
11.2.14 Homosexuality and sexual violence in a boarding school
11.2.15 Gay sex and sense of domination and intrusion
11.2.16 Gay guys and compulsory military service
 
12 GAYS AND ANXIETY
12.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
12.1.1 Reactive anxiety
12.1.2 Anxiety and homophobia
12.1.3 Anxiogenous situations for a gay
12.1.4 Taxonomic categories and interpretative categories
12.1.5 Internalized homophobia and gay discomfort
12.1.6 Interacting with an anxious subject
12.1.7 Gay Sexuality and anxiety
12.1.8 Anxiety arising from moments of uncertainty about sexual orientation 
12.1.9 Anxiety from presumed inadequacy 
12.1.10 Friendship and sexual confidence
12.1.11 Anxiety and problematisation of sexuality
12.1.12 How to overcome the anxieties connected to sexuality
12.2 DOCUMENTS
12.2.1 Gay sexuality and anxiety 
12.2.2 Gay anxiety and socialization
12.2.3 Homosexuality, anxiety and sexual experiments 
12.2.4 Gay obsessive jealousy
 
13 HOMOSEXUALITY AND FEELINGS OF GUILT
13.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
13.1.1 Concept of feeling of guilt
13.1.2 Function of the sense of guilt
13.1.3 Codes of behavior and individual well-being
13.1.4 Moral freedom and feelings of guilt
13.1.5 Dysfunctional attempts to overcome feelings of guilt
13.1.6 The conquest of moral freedom
13.1.7 Self-degradation
13.1.8 Dangers of behavior patterns
13.1.9 Feelings of guilt induced by theoretical models
13.1.10 Infidelity: the roots of betrayal
13.1.11 Frantic sexuality and emotional needs
13.1.12 Intenalization of the prejudice of others
13.1.13 Moralism and inability to understand the betrayal
13.1.14 Self-esteem and feelings of guilt
13.1.15 Masturbation according to the Catholic Church and feelings of guilt 
13.1.16 Sexual pleasure in a document of the World Health Organization 
13.2 DOCUMENTS 
13.2.1 Birth of a gay couple
 
14 AFFECTIVITY AND SEXUALITY MODELS
14.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
14.1.1 Models of affectivity and sexuality 
14.1.2 Sex-centric models and models with widespread sexuality
14.1.3 The possible gay couple
14.1.4 An attempt to put in practice an abstract model of a gay couple 
14.1.5 A search for a balance without models of couple life 
14.2 DOCUMENTS 
14.2.1 Gay sex for not thinking
14.2.2 Gay love without gay couple
14.2.3 Gays and sexual fidelity
 
15 GAYS AND GAY NORMALITY
15.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
15.2 DOCUMENTS 
15.2.1 A normal gay
 
16 GAYS AND DIVERGENT THINKING
16.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
16.2 DOCUMENTS 
16.2.1 Gays and family
16.2.2 Non-possessive gay couple
16.2.3 A non-standard gay couple
 
17 GAY LOVE AND SOCIAL CONDITIONING
17.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
17.2 DOCUMENTS
17.2.1 Gays and social status
17.2.2 Gay couples and money
 
18 GAYS AND COUPLE STABILITY
18.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
18.1.1 Statistics on gay wedding 
18.1.2 What results from Gay Project
18.2 DOCUMENTS
18.2.1 A gay guy who wants to come back single
18.2.2 Gay holidays
18.2.3 Beware of good gay guys!
18.2.4 My story – Crisis of a gay couple
18.2.5 Gay couples: illusions and disappointments
 
19 GAY INTERGENERATIONAL RELATIONSHIPS
19.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
19.2 DOCUMENTS
19.2.1 A gay couple with 40 years of age difference
19.2.2 A gay different from other gays
19.2.3 Gay guys and intergenerational sexual fantasies
19.2.4 Different among those who are different
19.2.5 Appearance and reality of a gay life
19.2.6 Gay love between a twenty-year-old and a forty-year-old
19.2.7 A gay couple 27 years together  
19.2.8 Regrets and gay morality
19.2.9 Doubts of a gay 40-year-old 
 
20 GAYS AND PREVENTION 
20.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW 
20.1.1 Statistics on sexually transmitted diseases
20.1.2 Risky approaches to sexuality by younger guys
20.1.3 From gay dissipation to gay commitment
20.1.4 Gay love and HIV test
20.2 DOCUMENTS
20.2.1 About unprotected gay sexual intercourse
 
21 OCCASIONAL GAY SEX
21.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
 
22 DANGEROUS GAY DATING
22.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
22.2 DOCUMENTS
22.2.1 Violence and gay sex 
22.2.2 Power and gay prostitution
22.2.3 University gay prostitution 
22.2.4 Gays and risks in chat 
22.2.5 Learning from gay experiences
 
23 SEX IN GAY-STRAIGHT RELATIONSHIPS
23.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
23.2 DOCUMENTS
 23.2.1 Sex between a gay and a straight
23.2.2 Temptations of a gay guy in vacation
23.2.3 Gays and repressed instincts
23.2.4 Gay guys who see straight friends as gay lovers
23.2.5 Gay-hetero relationship and sexual embarrassment
 
24 LATENT HOMOSEXUALITY 
24.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW 
24.1.1 Latent homosexuality and marriage
24.1.2 Gays and available guys with latent homosexuality
24.2 DOCUMENTS
24.2.1 Is he a latent gay? 
 
25 GAY SEX FANTASIES AND OBSESSIVE CONTENTS
25.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
25.1.1 Gay sex fantasies and obsessive contents
25.1.2 A real case of gay-themed obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) 
25.1.3 Sexual abuse and obsessive contents
 
26 MARRIED GAYS
26.1 GENERAL OVERVIEW
26.1.1 Homosexuality as guilt-pathology and marriage as a remedy
26.1.2 Email from a gay guy about to marry
26.1.3 Underestimation of gay sexuality and overvaluation of that hetero one
26.1.4 The reactions of the girls
26.1.5 Gay husbands and conflictive marriage
26.1.6 How married gays live their gay sexuality
26.1.7 Critical points of a gay’s journey towards marriage 
26.1.8 Non-possessive women in love with gay men
26.1.9 Women exploited by gay guys
26.2 DOCUMENTS
26.2.1 A girl in love with a gay guy
26.2.2 A girl in love with a repressed gay guy
26.2.3 Story of a married gay guy
26.2.4 Experiences of a married gay
26.2.5 Gay fantasies of a married man
26.2.6 A married gay guy who has not repented 
26.2.7 Falling in love with a married man
26.2.8 Falling in love with a married guy – a very complicated situation

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